Depression

Haven't been in a good mood lately. A combination of things -- primarily involving work, since it constitutes 65% of my normal awake time. I didn't have high expectations, but seeing the small dollar figure actually on paper was still just as disappointing. My coworker seems to be quite pleased with his payout. It's not that he exceeded his sales plans and earned a hefty bonus -- it's because he is new to the position and this was his first year to receive a bonus of any kind. I guess this is a classic example of the matter of perspective. Since I've got a taste of a handsome payout in the past, it's hard to go back to the bare minimum. My bonus payout was 1/2 of what I received last year. I guess I should be grateful for receiving at least something. But you know that people are never satisfied... and I'm one of them.

On another note, I am depressed to learn that a lot of people in our company are leaving. First, some of my closest coworkers have relocated to other places. Second, people are resigning left and right -- moving onto greener pastures I guess. Although I do not know these people on a personal level, it's very unmotivating to hear about resignations everyday. It almost feels like everyone is trying to jump off a sinking boat, and I am the only one left behind. (In case you're wondering, I have been trying to jump out myself, but results have been unsuccessful and difficult.) And just today, I have yet to hear another person abandoning me. This time, it's my own boss!! He's not "leaving" the company per se, but leaving the department. He got reassigned to other department Needless to say, I am very very sad...